let me sum up the abortion debate for you
It’s like yelling at your neighbor about the couch he keeps in his house. OH WAIT. YOU CAN’T YELL AT YOUR NEIGHBOR ABOUT THE COUCH HE KEEPS IN HIS HOUSE. BECAUSE IT’S NOT YOUR HOUSE, SEE? No matter...
View Articlei want to be funny BUT I AM STRESSED OUT OKAY GOD GET OFF MY BACK
We survived our four-day trip to Phoenix. Next time I want to stay long enough to be able to forget the horrors of the flight out there before we have to get on a plane home, though. One of the main...
View Articleoh, hey, I should update this
Lately my darling son has been a real dick. Yeah, that’s the story I’m leading with, do you have a problem with it? IF SO I WILL GROUND YOU. I am pretty much the best at grounding people lately. I...
View Articleget your shittin’ pants ready.
I took the kids camping a couple weekends back. We were doing the campfire horror story thing, and here’s what Taylor came up with. SHUT THE FUCK UP. NO HANDRAILS?!? Sleeping with all the teddy bears...
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on ruining my future
Last week I made The Biggest Mistake of My Life. Let’s back up for a minute. I’ve been self-employed since March 2010. It is simultaneously the shittiest and the best job in the history of ever. My...
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deep-fried biscuits-n-gravy balls, y’all.
Shit. Just. Got. Really. Real. I invented these things for Norcross because biscuits-n-gravy is his favorite breakfast ever and I wanted to see if I could make them even better (in his eyes). Also...
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best gingersnaps in the world
For me, the holidays mean basically one thing and one thing only: It’s gingersnap time. There’s almost nothing better than sitting down with a mug of hot chocolate in which to dip my gingersnaps while...
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coconut raspberry thumbprint cookies. do not share with Yoshi.
I don’t know where my mom got this recipe, or if she invented it herself, but these things are bite-size and addicting, which is a perfect combination. They also remind me of Yoshi’s cookies, which...
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31 Fright Nights, bitches.
OMFG spoopy creeper friends, it’s the month* of scary movies. *let’s be real, every month is scary movie month. I’m living that Roku TV life and pretty much the only thing I miss about having cable is...
View ArticleA guideline for my kids
My kids are very independent. This isn’t a humblebrag; I’m sure I could stand to be a bit more managerial as a mom. But I was raised in a household of independent people, and past a certain age— the...
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